How I See Things

How I See Things
Cartoon-like drawing in shades of dark to medium purple. Eyes with beautiful eyelashes, looking through a pair of glasses.

Monday, September 28, 2020

Resting Your Eyes vs. Palming

When I was little, I remember my dad saying, “I’m just resting my eyes.” I am not sure if it was because I was talking too much and he needed a break. (He did, one time, yell at me: “You talk too much!” I went next door to the widow and asked her if I talked too much. She so graciously replied: “I like it.”)

So, Dad would be sitting up, and “rest his eyes.” He would close his eyelids and sit there for a while. 

When I started Vision Therapy, they taught me palming. Well, I had read about it in a book years ago called, “You don’t have to wear eyeglasses,” that my violin teacher had loaned to me at one point. I never really did it. I didn’t think much about it. 

[A photo of me covering my eyes with my hands. Left hand's fingers overlap my right hand's fingers.]

I got to Vision Therapy and on the first day of therapy, they told me to Palm. I cupped my hands over my eyes, and rested my eyes for a bit, wondering how this was different from what my dad did when I was little. 

After more than a year, going to Vision Therapy, I was, once again, Palming in between activities. As I sat there, palming, I asked my Vision Therapist “what is the difference between closing my eyes to rest them, and palming?” 

She gave me a great reply - she said that closing our eyes is fine. But if we palm, then the warmth from our hands can cause our eyes to tear up just a little bit. It gives our eyes some moisture. 

What a fantastic reply! I had no idea! New information! I love learning new things!!

Thinking back about my dad “resting his eyes,” now that I am a parent, I wonder if perhaps he was napping. 😆😂

Monday, September 21, 2020


My Optometrist gave a talk on Memorial Day. He interviewed me and I was 1 of 2 current patients of his that he featured in the talk. In order to see the talk, you need to have a membership to an optometry website: I heart VT. Like - I love Vision Therapy. I think this is the link: 

[Photo: the iheart VT logo. There is a black heart to the left of the words, and the photo has a magenta offset heart above it and to the left, and a turquoise offset heart below it and to the right.]

I wonder how many of you relate to some of the things he said?
The topic was Dissociation. He was explaining how Optometrists can recognize that many of their patients probably do it. And how to help them with Vision Therapy.
There are some of the symptoms -
  1. Tunneling. Meaning, focused so intently on what you are looking at, so that the background disappears. This can show up as a person walking and staring at the ground, unable to look up as they walk. This can also show up with horse back riders - they stare at the horses head to the frustration of horse riding trainers.
  2. Sensitivity to light. Keeping lights off in the house. Walking around in the dark.
  3. Issues with driving and parking. Not able to gage what speed you are going. Not able to park straight.
  4. Being startled easily when things come in to your visual range.
  5. Unable to focus on reading. Unable to focus on studying.
  6. Things (like furniture, the floor, fixed objects) “move.” (Jareth has this. It was my normal; I didn’t realize I have this until vision therapy made things stop moving and then it was AMAZINGly calm.)
  7. Perhaps existing in a “fictional world” in your head. That can feel very real. 
  8. Isolation. This one struck me big - because I see me having been doing this over the years, more and more: Isolation, over time, means "not wanting to leave the house." Closing curtains and closing yourself in. It doesn’t start when someone is younger but increases over the years. I just blocked off my windows with contac paper maybe 2 months ago. My decluttering expert unblocked windows of mine. And I have basically re-blocked them off. Remember, I am approaching 50. So if you’re in your 20s or 30s, you may not relate to this one. No worries.
The exercises they have given me - wear ankle weights during vision therapy and at home now and then (light weight: 1 pound weights) and use a weighted blanket have helped me. There was a time during Vision Therapy with my therapist, A, when she asked me "how are you doing?" And I replied: "I think I am dissociating." She got into gear and made the exercise much harder so I was forced to pay attention!

That moment was a pivotal moment for me - I need to pay attention to the HERE and NOW. Smells, sensations, my 5 senses ... these are the things I pay attention to much more now after months of vision therapy with their focus to help me not dissociate anymore! I don't think I dissociate anymore, but I will get back to you on that. This is HUGE!

By the way, people who dissociate in their childhood (as I did), have large chunks of their memory missing. I have large chunks of my memory missing. I do remember, as a child, thinking, "I need to remember my memories, or I will forget them." And I would sit there and intentionally review my memories. I wonder if other people ever did that too? Please let me know your thoughts on this topic in the comments, below. Thank you!

Monday, September 14, 2020

Migration Complete

I have moved the posts from the very expensive blog host to this much less expensive platform (and much easier for me to use) to Blogger from Google!

I hope you will subscribe to my blog posts, so you will be notified when I post new blog posts!

The mail chimp newsletter service no longer works from the old blog, I am not sure why. But Blogger has their own "Subscribe to my posts!" Link - it's in the right side bar on every page - just under the "About Me" photo. 

I have typed up a few posts and they will run soon. I will keep the posts coming on Mondays. My vision therapy days have been changed to Thursdays now that we are doing Vision Therapy back in the office in Manassas. 

Monday, September 7, 2020

For the Vision Impaired

[This is my friend, Phoenix's logo for his business, Midnight Hobbit. It is a cog wheel with an artistically drawn letter M. The cog wheel and letter M are lit in subtle transcolers - fading from light blue to pink to white, and back to pink and light blue.]

A friend of mine, Phoenix from Midnight Hobbit, recently started updating his social media posts with words to describe what images or memes say. 

A lot of memes are too hard for me to read. Phoenix's descriptions help me understand what it is I am looking at. I have started to do this sort of thing, too, when I post things. 

I just want to give a shout-out to Phoenix for introducing me to this concept and also to my friend, Stacey of Stacey's Solutions, for recently talk-dictating a meme that she had posted that I just couldn't read. I am grateful for my friends who help people like me, with invisible disabilities, so that we can engage in the things they want to share. 

[Photo, a bright fuscia zinnia on a blurred green background. A bee collects pollen from the bright  yellow stamen in the center of the flower.]

Friday, September 4, 2020

My Artwork on Masks

I have previously mentioned that I am an artist. I love to paint with acrylics and watercolors. I also illustrated a few yoyo books for my dad, "Professor Yo-Yo." 

You can order masks with my artwork on them from Zazzle at:

This is a photo of my favorite mask. I wear it a lot - it has my favorite water painting on it!

The masks are lightweight and let you breathe in cool air instead of your own hot air. Also, they have a pocket for you to add an optional filter if you would like one. 

Flickering Eyesight

So, I have known for a long time that my eyes don’t work together. It has taken me almost 50 years to be able to describe what I see to peop...